Crossroads - Prologue (Asra POV)
The night I left them, it wasn't out of my own volition. People have a place in the world, and it comes with a role to fulfill. When the gears start turning, they must follow it. I knew this day was coming, the cards had told me. Nevertheless, it didn't make parting with them any easier. It hasn't been for years.
That fateful night, I heard the Magician's ominous call, "It's time Asra. When you leave, the story will start." No matter how much I begged in my heart, time wouldn't go back. I had to leave them so they can make their own choice. Alone. I worried they would be in danger, I couldn't live with myself if they were injured! My dreams were filled with worst-case scenarios, but my mentor reminded me there was nothing I could do to prevent what must happen.
"The worm is ready to build its shell to transform into a butterfly, but first it needs to realize it will not otherwise survive."
So I need to let go of their hands and let them face danger. My stomach gnawed with worry. I hated it. The Magician, sensing my distress, took the chance to mock me. The prospect was tempting, but I could not run away with them. This process would lead to their happiness, I think. That's what I wanted the most.
The world, sensing my effort to stall for time, interrupts the reading. I pack my things and say goodbye, leaving from the back door. The tarot deck is in their hands now, for when they need a guide. Immediately, I hear another hurried knock on the front of the shop.
"You mustn't turn, Asra," The Magician says.
I know. I know . I gathered courage and sprinted into the night. Running always helped me forget. Love, pain, longing, but I couldn't do it for long. The place I planned to go to wasn't one I could reach on foot.
Like second nature, I slipped through my personal gate. The familiar oasis greeted me. I stepped forward, ready to run from my feelings.
Sometime later, the Magician spoke again. "It has begun. Your beloved has fallen asleep. Good luck, Asra." What does their falling asleep has to do with me? I knew better than asking to get an answer. If they were sleeping, then they were alive. I had to believe they were alright. Their reading concerned me. I should ask Muriel to check upon them.
Crossroad dream
By now, I'm used to it. A side-effect of the deal I made three years ago. Every so often, they find me. It's not for long. We stand at a crossroad, a metaphor of the present situation, dark and dim. I explain just enough without sugar coating and wish them the best in my heart before our moment ends.
Asra on the road takes the wrong path
The next time I see them, it's in a similar same place. However, I hadn't noticed their presence behind me. They call out, extending their grasp towards me. My heart leaps as hope and love flood my thoughts.
When I wake up, my heartaches. It wants to jump out of my body and go to them. My home. I want to see them. I want to touch them. I want to care for them. I love them so much. I want them to remember our time together. How much they have changed me and how much I'm willing to give to be together. I'm not the same person I was four years ago. I want to be more honest. I want to talk to them until we're exhausted. I want to be with them knowing they want me as much. I don't want to lie to myself anymore. But it's not easy. Life has never been easy. Not when I truly want something.
I lay on the grass for who knows how long until I calm down. I get up and continue traveling, searching for adventure to soothe the stirred emotions in my chest.
MC connects with Asra through the fountain
After contacting Muriel and hearing they are alright, I'm calmer. I take a few deep breaths and hesitate to send Faust to find them. She worries for me but eventually crosses the portal back to Vesuvia. I double my efforts to explore, struggling without Faust but managing. The new sights and places are fun.
As I'm sitting on a nearby pond, the person I least expected but wanted to see the most greets me through the water's reflection. My heart jumps. They found me. Deep in my gate. They did it. I'm reassured to see Faust with them. If they tracked me, perhaps they are strong enough. My hope bubbles as they tell me what happened since I left. When I mourn my absence from their life, I catch myself, telling them they actually didn't need me at all.
The moment feels right. I try to convey my desire, to be honest, and I would like them to be honest with me as well. having stayed at the palace for a few days, I'm not surprised their first question is about the people I met there. But there's only one question from them I truly care about. While I want to tell them everything, the memories of their pain haunt me. Perhaps things went wrong because they weren't ready. If they reach out for answers, I won't hesitate to tell them the truth.
'I want you to know how much I love you. But I can't tell you until you decide you're ready. Perhaps you will never know. But I'm alright with that because your happiness is the most important thing to me.'